“how do you balance job and photography?”

This question was sent in from Wolfram Nagel and Angela Schwinning. It is a question I have asked myself and been asked about continuously over the years. And in this article I will tell you why it has a very current relevance.

It is all about balance. In a greater sense: the way we balance our time of existence is the key to a happy and successful life. Now, don’t worry. This will not get philosophical here or be one of those life coach articles that are nothing but empty phrases. But how to balance time in a busy life is a decent question. I can assure you: I am no authority in this and I struggle myself. Over the years I have found my ways to seize opportunities and be quite opportunistic, but the answer goes deeper than that. Let me explain.

I already shared the back story of how I started to photograph in the last blog article. The ‘free time’ I had to start photography back in 2016 was because of the collapse of my marriage. I did not get to see my kids every day anymore, did not have family life and was alone often. And on the many business travels that year, I did get evenings in hotel rooms or outside in the towns I stayed at. In short: instead of social life, I did photography. You be the judge if that was a good decision, a healthy balance, a desirable trade. I would not recommend you following that path, but back then I hardly had a choice. Luckily for me it turned out well in the end.

But no matter what situation in life you are in, time probably is scarce. Ever feel rushed and like you would love to have 34 hours per day instead of 24? Count me in.

Days are simply too short.

Or: I try to jam too much into them and always end up chasing to do lists in a tiring pursuit.

Or: I do not even have those lists which could provide structure and priority, but instead have a nagging feeling of ‘I should get this and that done soon’.

Well, I always try to become better at this. But with varying results.

It is an ever present challenge to balance every day life and its responsibilities with all the visions, projects and ideas in mind. This yearning desire to create and express, be it in visual, written, sung or whatever form. It is an inexhaustible well of joy and can be of frustration at the same time (more of joy, really, and that is why I love it). I have come to accept that. And I have learned to say “no” to things or possibilities being offered. But oh boy, is it tempting to jam another task or idea into an already tight schedule. Realising that saying “no” is alright, in fact is necessary, has been a relief once I started doing that a few years back. The “no” to somebody else turned into a “yes” to myself.

“We need to do a better job of putting ourselves higher on our own ‘to-do’ list.”

— Michelle Obama

I understand that some people who follow me on social media might get the impression as if I was traveling and photographing all of the time. But this is far from the truth. Let us have an inside look into my 2022, shall we? I have photographed and recorded video for an online workshop series in local woodlands in January. In March I lead a workshop at Lofoten, Norway. In April I went on a one week photo tour together with friends to Northern Spain. And in May I went on vacation with my girlfriend to Southern Spain (and took my camera with me for a brief shooting). In between the travels I took my camera with me on some rare occasions but hardly ever photographed, especially in the months since my last trip. I am not complaining at all and I cherish every trip and every possibility I had to photograph. I know I am blessed to be doing all the aforementioned. But I can also imagine some readers might now think “well, I photographed more than he did”.

But this is what it is for me trying to do my full time job in HR in the finance industry as good as I can, while still pursuing my career as a photographer and artist and also maintaining a social life with partner, kids and family. And I love both of my careers really. The one in my main job now being done for 25 years. And photography having evolved from being a hobby into a profession, which gives it a very special quality to me.

So let us have an honest deep dive into how things go and how things were. I am being honest, I felt bad in 2021. My main job got more and more demanding. You might have experienced the same in your job during Covid: while working from home gave some free time because you needn't drive or travel to the office anymore, all that saved time got filled up with more and more online conferences and meetings (sometimes two web conferences at the same time) and an ever increasing flood of mails to work through. Just because other business partners weren’t traveling either and had more time to send more mails themselves. Everything speeded up and the workload exponentially grew. By a lot. That’s why I always cringed when reading ‘now it’s time to slow down’ on Social Media back in 2020. I have no clue who that was for. Not me, for sure! During lockdowns there also was home schooling with my kids, who just like their parents became increasingly frustrated and impatient with themselves and everyone around (which I cannot blame them for. They did great during the crisis, actually). Not a fine surrounding for trying to also be creative in the remaining free time.

When ‘work’ was done, I replied to mails, wrote bills and made sure to be inside deadlines. And when I finally sat in front of the computer late in the day, eventually giving myself time to create, more often than not I found myself pulling sliders inside Lightroom back and forth without satisfaction or inspiration. That frustrated me totally. I was willing to create. I knew how important creating is for my well-being. But I couldn’t do it. After one or two hours I shut down the computer with zero result other than going to bed tired and frustrated. I know this usually comes and goes. But it came more than it went.

My book project I had started to work on in 2020 got pushed back to the end of the priority list over and over again. Which was another point of frustration, because this project is very important to me. But it is an endeavor which also requires a free and flowing mind. Something I haven’t had much at all during the last 1,5 years or so.

I knew something had to change. I knew that if I continued that way, one of the possible endings of this road would be burn out. But it took me until early 2022 when I decided that I would not, that I could not continue like this anymore. Which was tough for me because “I cannot” has never been in my vocabulary. So I tried to change my mindset into “I CAN do this in a different way”. I can work part time in my regular job and can work part time as a professional photographer and artist without losing myself. Eventually I decided to reduce my regular work hours to have one day per week off.

So here I am: more than one month into this part time journey. I say “I can”, hoping I really do. Because honestly I am at the start of this. I don’t know how things will look in a few months. It is not only a journey into art, it is even more so a journey into entrepreneurship. Something I am looking forward to. Is the timing good? Well, at the start of a global recession, the environment could not be more hostile. I do know this. And I accept this challenge. But I believe in my work and its quality. And in the end I need to look after myself now. I need to look for purpose and be well. It is about time. Literally!

You might think “thanks for the input, but how do you actually balance all this?”. Well, planning and communicating is key. Yet, that balance is ever shifting. And it does not find me, it needs to be created. And needs an understanding partner.

When starting out as a passionate hobby, I did spend almost all my free time either photographing, editing or learning photography by reading or watching tutorials, listening to podcasts and digesting every info I could get. This happened naturally out of sheer excitement. I stopped spending time caring about football (I was a great fan of Hannover 96 before and tried to watch every game either on tv or in the stadium), did not go out much anymore and got fully immersed into photography. When going on short weekend or day tours with my kids, I looked for locations with ‘photography-potential’ and used the time there together with them for having a great time outdoors and also (secretly) scouting. A few times I also used having flexible working hours and went photographing early in the morning or right after work. I found my ways in optimizing available time.

“...in the end I need to look after myself now. I need to look for purpose and be well. It is about time. Literally!”

— Kai Hornung

But of course, this only goes so far. And in order to have a healthy family and social life, priorities needed to be shifted. Because again, this needs to be in balance, too. And no, I did not find this balance right away. I surely had my experience of being too egoistically and too much into photography: posting another image on Instagram while my kids waited for me to play games with them, ruining a trip for my partner, because all I thought of was going to the next spot during times others sleep in, have breakfast or go for dinner. It is demanding a lot out of a partner to agree that instead of having a nice dinner on a holiday trip, you freeze your butt off while your photographing partner takes photos, then drive through the dark to return to the hotel late when every place you could eat at is already closed. Yep, I fell into that trap. Not good. And unfair to my loved ones. I needed to re-balance. Especially when the business side of photography started to take up more and more time, too.

Nowadays I reserve this ‘all about the photography’ attitude for ‘photo trips’ with friends and for just a few select days during family trips. And it is through communicating each others expectations before such trips, that it turns out enjoyable for all sides. If you are looking for some valuable recommendations on how to make family trips work for both: family and your photography, have a read of this great article ‘Photo Trip, Family Trip… or Both?!’ by Adrian Klein. He has it all covered in my opinion, so I will not repeat his recommendations here.

So thanks to my wonderful kids and my lovely girlfriend who support me and my art by following along often and letting me do my thing every now and then! I believe it is easier and better now than it was some years ago. It helps that my kids are getting older and more and more independent, too. And over time and after having amassed thousands of images on my hard drive, and having had the privilege to experience many unforgettable moments, I don’t feel the FoMo anymore when the sky blows up in front of my living room window. This more relaxed approach - also in the way I photograph and the subjects I frame for my images - indeed is getting along much better with my partner, my kids and people I am close with. …you should have heard the collective sigh of my kids in the past when we went outside and I grabbed my backpack with my gear before heading out: “Papa, again??? Are you serious?”. “…well, I bring it just in case!”… I can imagine that dialogue wasn’t really exclusive for the Hornung family.

So with that one day off for photography, I am entering a new phase. I am aware that I will not really end up photographing more than I already did. But what I feel most positive about is, that I can organize and structure my time better. I create spaces in which I can be creative. Start writing an article at 8 in the morning. Edit an image after that. Do calls at noon. Write mails and do paper work after a break. Actually get to plan new projects instead of just having them come towards me. This feels better balanced and enables me to ultimately be more creative again, instead of shoving this to the end of busy work days in my main job when I am flat out tired. So the last few weeks I have written a lot and edited several images for magazine articles. I prepared prints for clients and was more effective in my work as a professional artist. And I even headed out for a morning session photographing some mud cracks.

In the end I consider this being more mindful. Especially during the times when I am being creative. Something I still enjoy just as much as I always did. Will there ever be enough time for all of my plans and ideas? I doubt it. But I can take that with a smile now, because well, it is what it is while being on a creative journey. I will most likely not be able to do all the things I would like to do. But I can try to do the things I feel most passionate about and tell myself: “it is fine!”. And that in itself is a balance and feels good. Where will this journey lead me to? Time will tell.